Coach Lander becomes AD of IU hires Josh Zelman as head coach

Bloomington, IN - In a shocking move, Coach Lander has left SMU to take an Athletic Director Position with Indiana University.

“I had some great years in Bloomington,” said Lander.  “It’s an honor to come back and try and take the Hoosiers to the next level.  I think Josh will be the coach who can bring our football team to glory.”

Josh Zelman, the star quarterback at Arizona who never got an NFL career off the ground faces a big challenge in bringing the Hoosier back to respectability.

“Kellen Lewis reminds me of a young Dane Wright,” said Zelman.  “I think we have something special in the works here.”

In his first game, Zelman fell behind 14-0 to Indiana State but rallied back to pull out a 41-22 victory.

 

SMU moves to 2-0 with 34-14 win over North Texas

Dallas, TX - The SMU Mustangs downed the North Texas Eagles on Saturday in front of alumni and recruits alike.  Stone Cold Steve Austin was in attendance, as were two SMU recruits who got to watch the Mustangs eek out a victory in the rain.

The game was much closer than the score would indicate as SMU scored 2 quick touchdowns in the final two minutes to put the game away.  North Texas showed a strong running game from their QB and a vicious defense.  Of course Justin Willis didn’t make things any easier for SMU.

Willis was 9/19 for 219 with 2 TDs and 2 INTs, of course it should be noted that in the fourth quarter he threw a short pass to Colombus Givens that erupted into an 86 yard touchdown scamper.  Willis spent most of the day throwing pics, missing screen passes, and generally making poor throws.

“Yeah I struggled,” said Willis after the game.  “It was raining and the ball was slippery you know?  Besides, we won right?”

Demyron Martin had a solid game going 17/58 for a TD, but he fumbled and will desperately need to work on his ball control skills.

The gamebreaker was TE Vincent Chase (pictured) who opened the game up with an incredible touchdown reception in the 3rd and another big play in the 4th.

“If any of you reporters refer to this team as my ‘entourage,’ I’m going to lose it,” said Chase after the game.  “My parents named me 20 years ago, before this dumb show started.  So no, I’m not related to him, no I don’t have an agent named Ari, so just drop it ok?”

But the game ball went to the SMU Defense - SS Tony Hawkins had 10 tackles, Bryce Hudman had a TFL and a 74 yard INT return, and finally Cory Muse looked like an impact player by making a dirty sack in the second quarter where he literally threw the North Texas QB to the ground like a bitch.

“That was pretty good,” said Stone Cold after the game.  “Cory might have a future in wrestling, I hear he likes pain killers so he might be a good fit.”

The Mustangs are now 2-0 and facing a pretty weak schedule.

 

Lander era begins with 51-32 win over Texas Tech

Lubbock, TX - The SMU Mustangs began their new era with a big victory over arch rival Texas Tech in Lubbock on Saturday.  Led by quarterback Justin Willis (who many say remind them of Dane Wright), the Mustangs pulled out a close win over the passing attack of the Texas Tech Red Raiders.

The game was a back and forth affair throughout with SMU making big plays off the option and the run, while Texas Tech chewed away at the SMU secondary which looked exceptionally weak.  Texas Tech QB Graham Harell was 33/50 fro 410 yards, two touchdowns and two interceptions.  Sadly for Harell, both interceptions were returned for touchdowns.

“He was pretty good,” added SS Tony Hawkins.  “But we were just a little better.  We gotta keep it more real next time.”

On offense, the Mustangs were led by Demyron Martin who carried 9 times for 154 yards, including one picture perfect play where he took the hand off, followed two stellar blocks and scampered 70 yards for the touchdown.

Quarterback Justin Willis was 8 of 12 for 180 yards and 3 TDs, while only throwing one pic.  He also ran six times for 63 yards, making him a real threat to run on every single down.  This dual threat has not been seen since Dane Wright in 2012 when he had the best single season in the history of NCAA QBs.

Noted Wildcat booster Myles V. was in attendance for the game and had this to say

“I’m looking forward to the great view of Lubbock,” said Valentin. “In my rearview mirror.  This place is a  dump.  SMU is ok, not enough thugs though.  We’re working on it.”

SMU will be having their home opener next week against North Texas (Stone Cold Steve Austin is an alum and will be in attendance.)

 

Arizona destroys Washington 42-17 in the rain…in Tucson?

Tucson, AZ - The Arizona Wildcats continue their march to another Pac Ten title, this time with a 42-17 win over the Washington Huskies.  Amazingly, the game was played in a downpour, in Tucson.

“Finally,” said receiver Ryan Parrish.  “We go up there and it’s always rainy and crappy.  They always look forward to coming here to check out our girls, hang by the pool in the hotel, and take it easy.  Those jerks.  I hope they had to go back to the hotel and put their socks on a radiator like we always do.  Although usually their uniforms are wet anyways when they play here.  Wet from crying! yes!”

The game was pretty close in the first quarter as both teams tried to figure out how to play in the desert rain.  But by the 2nd quarter, the Wildcat offense was clicking and the defense was hitting.  Alan Barron looked like a superstar, again, going for 128 yards and two touchdowns.  And Brent Robinson played a great game going 17/28 for 260 and 3 TDs.

“It’s just the team playing as a team,” said Robinson.  “We’re starting to get a lot better, and Darrell is becoming a real go to guy.”

Darrell Ross has finally arrived and had his best game ever.  Making four catches for 113 yards and 2 TDs.  He credited the good game to the wonderful smell of rain in Tucson.

Finally, Ben Bray continues show that he might be the best Linebacker in the Pac Ten, and maybe, just maybe, one of the greatest in Arizona history.

Rankings
#12 Coaches
#9 AP

 

#15 Arizona upends #1 USC at home 41-9. Tucson crowd chants “overrated”

Tucson, AZ - With all the distractions of the past week, many thought the Arizona Wildcats had been given up for dead.  With #1 USC coming into town, it looked like a year for the wildcats to just lay back and hand the Pac Ten to their LA rivals.  But, they play the games for a reason.  And today, Arizona showed that they are not dead.  They were just sleeping against FSU.

The game began with an injury to USC’s Star WR Chris Carter - it just got worse from there.  Ryan Parrish and Andy Jackson both caught quick touchdown passes to give Arizona a 14-0 lead.

“Usually when Casey was the QB we had worries against USC,” said Parrish of the Wildcats former QB.  “I mean Lindsay would come to games, or he would be hungover, but you take that away, and you take USC’s advantage away.  Brent ain’t hollywood, he’s trill.”

The rest of the game just watched the Arizona defense step it up and completely shut down the Trojans.  Amazing work from the secondary, strong pressure from the D-line and incredible play from the linebacking core solidified the Wildcats as the best in the west.

“We are starting to play as a unit,” said Wildcat linebacker Ben Bray who had six tackles, 2 TFLs, and an INT.  “Literally, no one can stop us now.  We are taking the Pac Ten and we are going to show you how the Desert Swarm plays when it’s backed into a corner.”

The Arizona defense held the Trojans to 89 total yards of offense.  To give you an idea, Alan Barron rushed for 20 more yards than their team gained…total.

The one highlight for USC came in the 4th quarter when they rocked Alan Barron harder than he’d ever been hit before (pictured). The hit knocked the ball loose and took his helmet off.

“They got me,” said Barron after the game.  “Damn did they get me.  But I’m up, I’m good I’m still standing.”

Stats
Robinson
11/17, 239 yards, 3 TDs, 2 INT

Rush
Barron 20/109, 1 TD
Gilmore 6/81, 1 TD

Rec Parrish 3/121, 1 TD

DEFENSE
Fitzhugh - 6 tackls, 3 TFL, 1 Sack
Ben BRay 6, 2 TFL, 1 INT
Robinson - 2 Sacks

 

Arizona to face #1 USC in Tucson - Preview

Key Matchups

QB
Arizona - Brent Robinson, Sr - 99 - Growing into his as a QB, but wildly inconsistent.
USC - Anthony Gaines (bl), Jr - 88 - From Utah, knows Clarence Howard - 84 speed, 91 Throw Power, he’s got strength and speed. Barrett Dixon esque.
Advantage: Even

RB
Arizona - Alan Barron and Steve Gilmore - might be the most talented pair of RBs in the nation. If Robinson can get a decent passing game they will both have a great game.
USC - Will Hackett, Jr (86) and Barrett Smith, So (85) - Talented and fast. Could be trouble, but mostly will be eclipsed by Gaines
Advantage: Arizona

WR
Arizona - Bong Bong Fulton, Ryan Parrish, Darrell Ross - Young, inconsistent except for Parrish
USC - Chris Carter (89), Nic Pope (88), Bobby Gardner (84) - a fast dangerous group of WRs
Advantage: USC

OL
Arizona - All over 92
USC - all over 90
Advantage Arizona

Defense
Arizona - young led by Nick Robinson and Ben Bray
USC - all over 90, very talented
Advantage: USC
USC’s Carlos Davis from Richmond, CA said that Alan Barron was not a very good running back and that Arizona was ‘overrated.’
Kicker
Arizona - Jay Gibson - awesome
USC - Cory Perkins from Westmon, CA - Jay Gibson has publicly called him a “bitch” and said that he couldn’t “kick his way out of a paper bag, even if the bag already had holes in it, and was a really thin bag and kind of charred from a fire. He’s that much of a bitch.” Perkins replied by saying “White Center is gross.” Gibson shot back with “he getting stabbed. PERIOD. Quote me on that. I’m shopping for knives now.”

 

SVSW Egg and Black Kickers - a photo essay

 

Arizona wins first half of SVSW 26-23(OT)

Tuscaloosa, AL - Sometimes heroes come from the unlikliest of places. Jeff Biggers, a late TE recruit that doesnt’ even have a wiki page, ended being the unlikliest of heroes in SVSW. The game was also a chance for some major redemption for Brent Robinson who found himself benched throughout the game for bad throws.

The game was as tight as a game can be. With the lead going back and forth throughout, and the defense on both sides of the ball looking great. Arizona sophmore sensation Ben Bray came through with another massive game, this time with 9 tackles and four TFLs.

“This is South versus Southwest son!” said Bray after the game. “This is no joke, this game is REAL. We need to bring that egg back to Tucson. It’s our egg.”

The game was tied 10-10 at the half, when Robinson who had throw two bad interceptions was benched for Clarence Howard. Unfortunately the Utah native didn’t do much better as he threw another interception. And was rebenched for Robinson.

The Crimson Tide continued their strong play converting third downs and making passes to their Star WR James Thornton (Relative of Kenny?). Eventually scoring to make the score 17-10 with 2:30 left to go.

Robinson, being extra careful, led the Wildcats down the field for a touchdown with a minute thirty left to tie the game at 17-17.

Then Alabama put together an impressive drive and started to eat up the clock. But strangely, they started using time outs, and stopped the clock. Arizona’s amazing linebackers Ben Bray, Peter Brink, and Reggie Hughes came up big and held the tide to a fieldgoal. Which was kicked with only 30 seconds left on the clock. Arizona was out of time outs.

Brent Robinson took the field knowing he had to pass to win the game. He had one option, throw it long and pray that Ryan Parrish would haul in a miracle.

His prayers were answered, Ryan Parrish pulled in a miracle catch and managed to grab a few extra yards. For the first time in history, I actually used the spike ball play (thank god it’s an instant choice), and spiked the ball setting up a 38 yard fieldgoal by Jay Gibson.

Needless to say he made it.

The game went to overtime, and Alabama elected to play offense first (another bad coaching decision). The Wildcats defense continued it’s amazingly strong play and gave Bama a 3 and out. Meaning that Arizona only needed a fieldgoal to send to double overtime.

They started off running the ball and on the first play Alan Barron who ran for 114 yards on the day hit up a 20 yard scramble to put the ‘Cats within the 5 yard line. But a facemasking call put the Wildcats even closer. At the one. Two hand offs to Tim Christian went nowhere. So facing 3rd and one, Coach Stoops decided to let Robinson pass.

Brent dropped back, looked to his left and saw Jeff Biggers breaking off a SWEET out pattern, his cover man was behind him, and the ball sailed into his hands. Touchdown. Arizona wins 26-23.

 

Dreams crushed! Arizona loses 26-24 to #14 FSU

Tucson, AZ - The Arizona Wildcats are done for the year.  While the ‘Cats have won two national titles with one loss seasons, but something was different about this one.  Specifically, Florida State’s ability to hold onto the ball and just convert 3rd downs at will.

But most disappointing of all was Brent Robinson.  This was his chance to be a leader, to bring about a comeback victory.  But he was flat - too little, too late.

“I can’t believe this,” said Robinson.  “I wanted this to be my year.  We got the best set of recievers since I’ve been here, Alan is amazing, and our Oline is awesome.  And I can’t score.  This is terrible.”

And while it’s admirable that he is taking the blame, it doesn’t change the fact that Arizona lost.

Though this game could have been won a number of times - FSU caught some lucky breaks.  On one play a SURE interception went through Jared Gray’s shoulder (game glitch) and into the a hands of an FSU reciever.  Things got worse when Darrell Ross fumbled a punt at his own 12 that was picked up and brought into the endzone for a score.

I can’t write any more.  This one hurt.  It was not an epic loss like Colorado, it was just a case of Arizona get punched early and waking up too late.
FG

3-0 FSU

Robison picked off
Fitzhugh is going NUTS!

FSU is good
they are convert all 3rtd downs

Game glitch - ball goes THROUGH Jared Grays’ shoulder and FSU scores
9-0

they go for 2?

Andy Jackson scores aftera turnover froma sweet pass from Robinson - against a bad corner
9-7

FITZHUGH IS A MANIAC!!

FSU IS CONTROLLING THE BALL

Abother long ball control drive
TD FSU
16-7

Ross Turnover on ensuing kick

QB is unsackable, 2x he was in the grasp, broke out, passed for a TD
23-7
2nd Q

CANNOT STOP THE OFFENSE
Every ’sack’ he is always throwing

Long FG
26-7

Arizona cannot pass
struggling

Jay Gib FG after lots of running

ROBISON GETS FIRST SACK!!! 3rd Quarter!!1 finall

FSU eats clock
26-17 end of 3rd Q

ROBINSON ANOTHER SACK!!!

26-26 FSU - FSU has ball wiht 2 minutes left in 4thQ

FSU gets teh 1st down game over - ARizona loses

Arizona loses 26-24

Robinson
10/18 172, 2 TDs 1 int
Barron 12/67
Fitzbugh, Bray, Hughes all played big.

TOP
13:10 FSU
6:50 UA

SUCKED

 

Arizona demolishes Buffalo 69-14, Pac Man McCarthy scores TD on first touch

Tucson, AZ - There is a lot to be said about first impressions. Tyler Andrews, in his first play as a Wildcat threw an interception, was promptly benched, converted to DE and never played another snap again. Pac Man McCarthy had no plans of ‘going out like that.’ In the 2nd quarter of an inconsequential tune up game, the UB Buffs were kicking off the Wildcats after a fluke touchdown scored off of an interception. The ball hung in the air and came down in the hands of true Freshman Pac Man McCarthy. It was the first time he ever touched a college football. He decided to make it count.

McCarthy, blessed with 99 speed as a true freshman, made three cuts and was gone. Scoring a 96 yard Touchdown on his first ever play as a Wildcat.

“On behalf of myself,” said Pac Man after the game. “I’d like to let the whole Pac Ten know that I’ve arrived. Start recruiting corners, because I’m burning this league up.”

The rest of the game was equally uneventful as Brent Robinson picked apart Buffalo going 25/36 for 370 yard and four touchdowns. He also had two interceptions returned for touchdowns, but both were relatively flukey.

“Man, yeah they scored,” said Robinson. “But they really aren’t a very good team. They will remember those touchdowns forever. I mean, they live in Buffalo - everything is either frozen or on fire. Life really probably won’t get better until they die.”

The rest of the game was uneventful, a total domination by the Wildcats. The defense looked very good, Ben Bray and Quinn Scott are a superstar combo at LB - reminiscent of the Kevin Bonds/Patrick Rodriguez days.